Living Seoul

Last weekend I went horseback riding at BerAdel Equestrian Club in Daebu-do, which is an island a little more than an hour south of Seoul. I found out shortly after I moved here that my recruiters are married AND they’re both avid horseback riders. (And generally awesome people.) Jamie started a popular web site for Korean horseback riders and through the site met Jimmy, her husband, who used to be part of South Korea’s national equestrian team. His brother even competed in the ‘88 Olympics in Seoul for horseback riding.

BerAdel is a really swanky horse club. The owner runs a specialty elevator business and on the side became interested in horseback riding. He opened BerAdel as part of his passion for horses. The clubhouse does include a really fancy elevator, of course. The club itself is large, there are many fields and even guesthouses. There is also access to a beach, but it rained most of the day so there was no way we could ride there. Jamie told me many Korean TV shows and movies have been filmed a BerAdel. It was originally a training ground for Korean knights.

My own experience with horses is minimal. I rode a couple time in Texas for fun before I left. Though I rode on people’s ranches out in the Hill Country. Very informal. Very Western. The riding at BerAdel is all English horseback riding. It’s much more formal. Fortunately Jimmy gave me a lesson. The video below shows him explaining to me the basics of mounting the horse.

Here’s a picture of me actually riding the horse.

After riding we shuffled into this little wooden room within the stables. It was filled with “Pegasus 501″s for our horseback riding simulation pleasure. We’re all so silly. And Jamie’s dog Twinkle makes a special guest appearance!

Result of the trip…my inner thighs were SORE SORE SORE for three days. But it was worth it!

Elephant Mart was the first thing I noticed when I arrived in Bangbae. I’d only been inside a couple times until tonight because I was so intimidated. I already dislike grocery shopping but this is a whole other level. Behold, a frazzled Melinda after a solo trip to Elephant Mart!

EDIT: The peanut butter cookies are so SO delicious. The gum sucks, flavor doesn’t last at all. Made a *majestic* egg sandwich for dinner. Cooking eggs in the microwave is totally genius. :) Total cost of groceries was about 30,000KRW…a little under $30USD.

1. So many coffee shops, but they’re almost all chains–The Coffee Bean, Starbucks, Angelinus, Tom N Toms. And the coffee is expensive!

2. High heels everywhere. So many band-aids covering blistered heels.

3. I’d heard of soju, but makgeolli tastes much better. It’s like a sweet, milky wine made from rice. Instead of the vodka-like flavor of soju, which is made from sweet potatoes.

4. Everyone watches TV on the subway. Cell phones have long antennas sticking out of them.

5. I can’t say enough how impressed I am with Seoul’s subway system. I always notice how clean it is.

6. Cars never yield to pedestrians! I witnessed someone get hit this weekend. (It was minor.)

7. Drunk business men. I thought it was just a joke. Nope.

8. Kimchi. The whole city smells like it.

9. Most women carry expensive looking bags. Sometimes men carry expensive man-bags. Also see many men carrying their girlfriend’s purse (and shopping bags).

10. So many restaurants where you grill meat at the table. It’s a novelty in the USA, but here almost every other place I go to has a grill at the table. Pork is common so you’ll see many signs with cartoon pigs wearing chef hats or something.

This morning I came across a New York Times story that says, “By 2015…12 prestigious Western schools will have opened branch campuses in a government-financed, 940-acre Jeju Global Education City…where everyone — students, teachers, administrators, doctors, store clerks — will speak only English. The first school…broke ground for its campus this month.”

I had no idea, but it’s more proof that Koreans are crazy about learning to speak English. So many people have asked me why I decided to come to Korea. It can be an overlooked country. Initially, I dreamed of teaching English in Europe or South America. After some research I realized it’s much more difficult and hardly as lucrative to teach in, for example, Spain or Argentina. Koreans are serious about education (it’s already QUITE clear to me) and an important part of education for Koreans right now is English. They know how important the language is for globalization and they’re willing to employ hundreds, if not thousands, of teachers in their country just to educate kids in English.

The other weekend I was talking to a teacher at a different school who claims the hagwons here are an education revolution. He thought there would be pages in the history books describing the blooming business of English education in South Korea. Revolution or not, it’s definitely seen as a business. Administrators and teachers at my school view the parents as our clients and we’re expected to work hard to impress and please them. It’s a much different mindset after attending public school my whole life. But these families are paying a pretty penny to send their kids to the schools. The children do deserve a top notch English education if that’s what they seek.

This past weekend I was able to move into my permanent apartment. It’s tiny…as I heard and imagined it would be. At first I was apprehensive, but I want accept it for what it is and make it my own. Two days after moving in my friend’s sister came to stay with me. She normally lives with her parents in a city south of Seoul, but she’s staying with me for a month while her parents are in the USA visiting my friend. She takes English classes in a part of Seoul very close to my apartment so it’s convenient. I am glad to have a native Korean to help me transition to the culture. And hopefully teach me some Korean. My apartment will seem twice as big when she goes back to her parents house in September, haha.

The bathrooms here are different than in the USA. Mine is extra small, kind of like an airplane bathroom. Instead of a tub and shower, the shower head comes out of the sink. You take a shower in the bathroom. Water goes everywhere. I’m beginning to enjoy it. The first time I drenched the roll of toilet paper and shaved off part of my fingernail. Things have improved since then.

My kitchen is also small and contained in a closet. There’s a sink and hot plate. Most teachers say that they do very little cooking. I will most likely do the same.

This weekend I also explored more of the city with friends. I continue to be impressed with the subway. It’s so easy to use and CLEAN. I rarely see dirt anywhere. No one speaks very much. People that ride are well dressed and polite. An old lady even offered me a seat and picked lint off my skirt! My favorite part is crossing the Han River. I live south of the river, but most of the “downtown” destinations are north. The subway comes above ground (obviously) to cross and you see a wonderful skyline and cityscape. Night or day it’s amazing.

Briefly:

-Friday evening visited a restaurant with flowing Makgeolli river (Korean rice wine)

-antics in Hongdae, club on top of a building, interior with fake rivers and grottoes, exterior Gaudi-esque rooftop that made me nostalgic for Barcelona

-stuck outside in downpour on Saturday afternoon while going to the subway, should ALWAYS bring an umbrella during monsoon season, but I still don’t do it

-visit popular English bookstore in Itaewon (part of town that targets foreigners, close to military base)

-go to obnoxious bar close to Itaewon with lots of foreigners, DNW

-night improves when I eat Cookies’n'Cream ice cream bar from convenience store :)

-Sunday visit Insadong area, stroll along outdoor market that reminds of of Las Ramblas

-towards evening catch subway to Namnaemun with lots of shopping, street food, outdoor stages and a violent carnival ride

-explore further into city center with friends and pass tons of stores selling motorcycles/scooters and then tons of stores selling pets

***PS: (what I have noticed) cars NEVER yield to pedestrians, everyone on the subway watches TV on their cell phone, at least 80% women wear high heels everywhere

Tomorrow will update about teaching adventures!

I am still getting used to the internet over here. It automatically takes me to Google Korea and Korean YouTube. Today I tried to upload video but it wouldn’t let me. My “location” was set to Korea by default. Because of a “real name identification law” here you’re not allowed to post videos…or at least I was not able to. The work around is that you have to set your location to another country. USA is not available, so I chose Italy. So strange. Anyway…below is a video I took during my layover in San Francisco. I was able to introduce my friends Vanessa and Sara to each other and was SO pleased they both showed up at the airport to hang out during my layover. We got breakfast in the Mission and walked around a bit. I was mostly sleepy.

The past few days have been a whirlwind!

I’m still getting used to Seoul. I feel somewhat debilitated and intimidated because I can’t communicate very well. I don’t live in a touristy area of the city so very few people speak any English. My neighborhood, Bangbae, is a peaceful, residential area…not as bustling as other parts of the city but still dense and urban. I like it here because it’s safe and quiet.

So far I feel lucky to be working at Alphabet Street. They have been quite accommodating and friendly. My first night in Seoul the principal of the school took me out for dinner, then bought me breakfast and water for the next morning. She drove me around in her car to make sure I understood the layout of our neighborhood. Some of the other teachers were surprised I had to come to work the morning after arriving in Seoul but that evening the school had a Welcome/Goodbye party. They served dinner, gave speeches and gave the departing teachers presents. They gave me a bouquet…so sweet!

The children are ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE. At my school we teach a class of kindergartens from the morning until early afternoon, then some random elementary classes in the later afternoon and evening. My kindergartners are called “Evergreens”. I teach seven 7-year-olds, but Korean ages are different so they’re really about six. They’re incredibly bright, attentive, eager and funny. Some of them have already latched on and constantly try to hold my hand, hug me and sit next to me. They notice everything! My earrings, my makeup, how I do my hair…they noticed my hairy arms the other morning. One little boy claimed I was a boy after he noticed. I told him he must be a girl because he didn’t have ANY hair on his arms.

I haven’t seen too much of the city yet. I’ve been working a lot and going out for dinner, but mostly in my own neighborhood. I saw some different areas of the city via car when I had to go to the hospital to get my medical check. That was a fiasco. I had blood drawn and wasn’t given a band-aid. The next step was to provide a urine sample. So I walked into the bathroom with blood dripping down my arm. Then I get into the stall and notice it’s a squatting toilet. I am bloody and trying not to pee all over the floor while aiming for this cup. Ugh. I was appalled at myself.

So, from the window of a car I saw some awesome buildings in the downtown area. There are tons of apartment buildings all over the place. Lots of signage and brands. I can’t understand most of it. Flashing lights. The subway is very clean and efficient. Tonight I ate a filling dinner for $3-4 at a local spot with a couple other teachers. I have little hope for ever cooking here. Neighborhood joints are cheap and filling. The outside smells like Korean food and sometimes garbage. Seoul has a distinct scent that I know I’ll never forget. It’s really humid here and has been raining a lot. Cars never yield to pedestrians. I’ve heard old Korean ladies can be really mean to foreigners, haha. The bathrooms are hard for me to deal with. They’re always wet because the shower head comes out of the sink faucet. There’s no stall or shower curtain. I never feel like my hair is clean. Right now I am living in another teacher’s spare bedroom in an older townhouse type arrangement. This weekend I’m moving into my own place. It’s a newer building but very very small.

I haven’t taken many pictures yet because I’ve been too busy and it’s rainy outside. I usually work from 9-9:30AM until 5-7:00PM with multiple breaks throughout the day. Jet lag hasn’t been terrible or anything. I get tired a little earlier than normal. The worst is that I keep waking up at 6:00AM every morning! I feel grateful for the people I know here. The teachers at my school have been completely friendly and helpful and the American friends I have here have made the transition so much better. I don’t feel “at home” here yet but I’m definitely comfortable and happy. I have many people who will help me and take care of me if I need it. I’m hoping for a fantastic year ahead.

I’m finally packed, but I have to wake up in about an hour to get ready to go to the airport. This was my progress from earlier today. I’m taking three rolling bags (checking two) plus a backpack. And my purse.

“BIG TIME SLOBS”

One of the saddest goodbyes I endured before leaving Austin this week. We totally cried after filming this.

I’m in Houston trying so hard not to hate it. I could never live here for more than a few weeks.

My evening went like this…

Leave Mom’s house in NW Houston with my sister at about quarter till 6PM. We’re in separate cars but both driving to Oishii for sushi, trying to make it for happy hour which ends at 7PM. Traffic shouldn’t be bad because rush hour is pretty much over and we’re driving into town. It ends up taking more than 30 minutes to go a few miles on 290E. Some idiots had an accident a few exits past the place we entered the freeway. Stuck forever, not moving at all. Foot tiring on the clutch. News traffic ‘copters hovering ahead. I’m in my car inhaling vehicle fumes and air conditioning. I’m starting to fume. Get past the accident. My sister and I communicating via cell phone and realize we’re definitely going to miss happy hour. Fine.

Miss happy hour but sushi is wonderful and cheap. Also eat delicious mochi with sis and her friend. (SO CHEAP. Go to Oishii at Richmond/Timmons!)

After dinner visit my friend in the Galleria area. Waiting to make a left turn. Range Rover in front of me stops at red light for left turn then white brake lights come on. Expect them to turn off when car goes back into “drive.” The white lights stay on. The traffic lights are going through their phases at the intersection and I’m freaking out because this car is still in reverse. I’m shaking before the light turns green and we get the left turn arrow. Waiting for them to reverse full speed into my car not realizing they’re still in reverse. Light changes and they start reversing…honk at them before they can hit me. They correct and swerve through the intersection. Almost hit the curb driving down the street. No idea what that was about.

Visit my friend for a couple hours. Highlight of my day! :)

Leave her apartment around midnight. I need gas in my car badly. There are a couple of gas stations at the next intersection past her apartment.. All kids of foolishness takes place on/around Westheimer this time of evening it seems. Guys in stupid cars making tire burning U-turns over and over again. One of the gas stations has unsavory characters loitering around outside, the crazy car turns into the other gas station. I continue on my way searching for a better place to get gas. Can’t find anything, start to waste gas driving around looking. Reach the freeway again and enter hoping to not run out of gas. Make it through the huge stack of freeways and get back to 290W. Take the first exit for gas. More shady characters. Pass two more gas stations…more shady characters. Maybe I’m choosy but it’s late and I’m alone. Mostly I try to prevent bad situations before they can arise. Maybe I hear too many horrible stories. Finally I choose one and get $11.34 of gas in a panicked fashion. (This will be the last time I fill my tank so I don’t want to fill all the way.) Plus some cars drive up and I worry. Get back on the feeder road and almost HIT A PEDESTRIAN. Not my fault. Some man wearing all black is lurching across the street. I notice him in just enough time to swerve into the next lane, avoiding him all over my windshield. I had a green light.

These types of events make me boil inside. Also, it feel gross here. It’s either raining, flooding and humid or blazing hot and the seatbelt burns you. People are fat here. There are endless boring suburbs…shopping center after shopping center. But even being away from the suburbs you’re still stuck with this weather. It smells bad because of all the cars. It’s like living in the shadow of flatulence.

So, Houston sucks but I love my amazing family and I’d travel anywhere to see them. Don’t want to drive anymore. End of rant story.

***Related to my last post…I DID apparently get Chickenpox some time as a child. Even though I didn’t have any symptoms. I have more than a normal amount of antibodies floating around in my blood.

Pre-departure visit to the ADC Travel Clinic. So many punctures! Warning about MONKEY BITES in Thailand…

Visiting with the doggies at Mom’s in Houston. Try not to mind my silly voice when I talk to Diesel.

My sister came to visit last weekend for her birthday. I got her a new backpack (and one for myself) for travel purposes. Showing her my new camera and goofing around in my apartment.

Sometimes I realize I’m about to be a teacher. My inspiration:

Fourth of July just ended. I can’t sleep. There are still fireworks blowing up in my head.

When I got back to my Mom’s tonight I had an email with my flight confirmation. Looks like I leave August 7th. Early early early in the morning. Singapore Airlines. I think they had a beautiful ad once that I noticed in a magazine.

I wondered earlier this year how people decide to stay in a city. I mean long term…for more than a year or so. I thought about myself. I stayed in Austin four years because of school. Then I stayed here because I got a job. It was supposed to be temporary. I sort of intended to move since 2008 but I just now got around to making it happen. I’ve been here six years total. Too long. And it’s not about disliking Austin. I think Austin is a great town. How do you know when it’s time to move on?

I couldn’t understand how it didn’t get old. The same restaurants, bars, stores, same people, same incestuous social circles, same roads every day, same events each year, same job, same place to live. It’s obviously my thinking that proves to me that Austin was not fitting right anymore. There must be a place somewhere that doesn’t get old. I realized though, it’s not all about the place anyway. It’s about what you’re doing in the place and who’s there with you. When you’re not doing what stimulates you and you don’t feel strong attachments to the people around you, the place can’t feel like home. Is this right? It starts to feel like going through the motions. I shouldn’t be going through the motions at age 24. That’s just not acceptable.

Granted, I’ve been able to do such interesting stuff the past year-ish. Probably in some effort to distract myself. Lots of mini-travels. Shows. Walks. Dinners. Guests. Tents in the living room. Minor league baseball games. Caving. Swimming.

It’s wanderlust. Escapism.

One day I’d like to feel settled. But I can’t imagine it now.

I have been issued a visa! This is my freaky pre-interview self from two hours ago…

Maybe this is off topic, but I just want to show off my SASSY sister. Her friend took this photo and I stole it off Facebook. I think she looks gorgeous. Such beautiful eyes! I’m proud we share the same genes. : )

Since I’m almost done with the job and visa acquisition process I thought I’d go over what it’s like in a little more detail. Parts of it were confusing. I had SO many questions along the way.

Interview with recruiter – There are tons of them out there. I started working with Korea Connections back in March at the recommendation of someone I knew. Usually recruiters would like you to fill out a brief application on their web site and do a phone or Skype interview. I think it’s mostly to make sure you’re not insane. And to see what your preferences are for the job…where you’d like to work, what age group, public/private, etc.

Recruiter sends you job opportunities – I started looking for a job pretty early. Even so, I began to receive viable job opportunities about a month after first speaking with a recruiter. You tell them which jobs you want to apply for and they set up an interview with the school. I’d typically do as much research as I could about the school before setting up an interview. I found blogs of teachers who had worked at both of the schools I considered accepting a position at. Quite helpful.

Start paperwork preparations – The recruiter normally asks you to start doing this right away. It can take some time to gather paperwork for the first round of documents you have to send to South Korea for an E-2 visa. Specifically the criminal record check, transcripts, diploma and passport. More about this later.

Interview with a school - I’ll just discuss the interview I did with the school I am going to work at. The recruiter set it up for me in the evening. A representative from Alphabet Street (school  I will work for) called me. There was a slight language barrier in addition to my phone’s crappy reception, which made it a little hard to completely understand everything. The interview was very much “question” / “answer” which made me nervous. I tried to be more conversational, but I felt like some of my remarks were lost in translation. They will typically ask you why you want to live in Korea, why you want the job, what teaching experience you have, what you do in your free time, if you have any questions. Ask questions! I didn’t says I had any and it made me look bad. I didn’t feel very confident when I got off the phone. I really wanted the job! It took a couple of weeks before I found out I was being offered the position. This was at the exact same time I was reviewing an offer for a different position at another school. Which brings me to the next step…

Get a contract – Once a school decides to hire you the first thing they should send is a contract. I felt pressure to give verbal acceptance quickly, but it’s worth taking your time to make sure the contract is sound. Overall, I looked for anything that was either missing, too vague or not fair. Though, it’s hard to know what could be wrong. I looked at one site that was helpful in laying out the contract and what to look for.

Send documents to Korea for visa processing – At this point, CONGRATS, you have a job! Obviously you must have a work contract to get a visa, specifically an E-2 work visa for teaching. These are the things you typically have to include in the package you send to Korea:
-signed contract Read it carefully!
-criminal record check (CRC) Here in Texas it only took 24 hours to get it (longer if you need it mailed). I’m pretty sure it’s just for the state and it costs about $25, plus make sure it’s notarized. I went to the DPS office at Airport and Denson here in Austin. The catch is that you still have to take it to the Secretary of State, also located in Austin, where they must apostille it. It seems like a fancy notarization. I think it costs $15-20 and they can do it right there while you wait. You can also do this by mail but it takes longer. Whatever you do, don’t remove the staple that attaches the apostille to the CRC. Apparently your documents can get rejected if you tear them apart. Mind were detatched, but I suppose I got lucky. I knew other people that paid $90-something for an FBI background check that can takes months for them to send you. I don’t think this is necessary for most jobs.
-4 passport photos I just paid Walgreens to do it. Cost about $18.
-passport copy Duh.
-transcripts It may take a week or two to have them sent to you. Korea is particular about having them sealed/signed/official. Costs about $10/transcript.
-health form Form you fill out saying you’re healthy and not on drugs.
-diploma Some schools will ask for an original diploma. Other will allow you to send a copy. However, sending a copy means getting it notarized and  aspostilled. My school really encouraged me to send my original, so I did. I didn’t prefer this but I figured out it’s only $10 to replace it from my university. They’re supposed to return it once I get to Korea. I think you’re supposed to keep it with you there because they can ask you to produce it at any point.

So how much did it cost to express Fed-Ex all of this over to Seoul? SIXTY-FIVE DOLLARS. Blarrrhhhgggghh. Felt like a chump, but it’s all for the bigger cause.

Receive visa confirmation number from Korea – Usually takes 2-3 weeks for the government to process your documents in Korea. They send your Korean contact (school/recruiter) a visa confirmation number that basically “okays” your paperwork on the Korean end. You need this number to complete your paperwork on the USA end.

Send documents to US Consulate for visa processing – Another package of paperwork to send off to the nearest consulate. Typically includes:
-passport I was so scared to send it in the mail.
-visa application with visa confirmation number and passport photo I definitely had questions about the application. I did some Googling and checked with my recruiter for answers.
-consul’s checklist Asks for basic school, medical, criminal, employment information.
-transcript
-$45 application fee Sent in a money order.

This time around I mailed my documents USPS overnight mail. It cost about $18. They give you a tracking number which made me feel much better about it.

Interview at US Consulate for approval - My documents were received by the consulate on a Friday and they called me on Monday afternoon to tell me my interview time. I thought I could get it changed for convenience purposes (because I still have a full-time job), but that doesn’t seem to be the case. The woman told me I could come THAT DAY or two days later. Then hung up. I feel bad for anyone who lives far away from their consulate. I hear they’ll allow Skype interviews sometimes. This is where I am now. I might do a pre/post visa interview video blog tomorrow.  My recruiter says they just check to see if you are physically and mentally okay to be a teacher. Since the schools are unable to interview you in person they rely on the consulate to some degree to make sure you’re okay. Then…

Receive visa - I think they mail it to you a few days later or you go pick it up in person.

Receive airline tickets!

As a result of my recent interest in Asian culture, I decided to watch Spirited Away with a friend last week. I like to think of it as an anime movie for people who don’t think they’d enjoy anime. I first saw it after it came out on video. My whiny high school self  had to be convinced to even give it a chance. I thought anime was so silly (Pokemon / Dragonball Z / I don’t know). I still don’t particularly like cartoons or animated movies. However, I was completely impressed. And I think I appreciated it even more this second time around. Vanessa and I squealed with delight when we saw Lin feed colorful stars to the adorable dust bunnies!

My curiosity caused me to do some Google research on these dirty dust balls. I realized they’re actually called Soot Sprites or Susuwatari, meaning “travelling soot” in Japanese. Look at :45 to see the scene where I fell in LOVEEEE!

Besides Soot Sprites existing in Spirited Away they’re also featured in Totoro, which I have not seen.

The reasons I like them:
-lanky
-curious
-adoring
-minuscule
-modest
-fuzzy
-loyal
-shy
-frightful

They’d make great pets and I don’t even prefer pets.

Also, I found these awesome shoes. I want to make some!

I recorded this video about a week ago but wasn’t sure if/when I should post it. And I just realized the video quality is kinda gross…and it’s kinda lengthy, but I promise I’m going to improve! More coming soon!

tl;dr I’m moving to Seoul in six weeks.

EDIT: I tried replacing the video with one that’s better quality. Hmm…waiting for my cute HD camera I ordered on Amazon. Hopefully the next post looks 1000% better!

A few weeks ago I got the idea to build a fort. Like, the kind you build with friends or siblings when you’re small. My sister and I loved creating forts, though sometimes Mom would get irritated that we took our beds apart and rearranged a bunch of furniture. More than 15 years later I almost thought I lost the skill when I tried to build one last week. I couldn’t get any of the edges of the blankets to stay in place. Scarves became handy. I had to incorporate my computer, TV and speakers so I could watch movies and listen to music in the fort. The overall result was satisfactory, not excellent.

I left it up Thursday through Sunday. Had to take it down because I couldn’t use my couch. I don’t think I’ll build another one for a while. Got it out of my system.

This weekend made me realize how much and why I’ll miss Austin. I spent two whole days laying around at the pool with friends. This city has such a great summertime culture. The Greenbelt, Lake Travis, various pools, kayaking, Tex-Mex and margs, grilling with friends, biking around, shaved ice, hanging out on porches and patios in makeshift chairs. Summer has never been my favorite season, but there’s an appeal when you spend it here. There’s a lot to appreciate about this place, but sometimes the memories get too heavy and you start to see the same scenery too many times. Doesn’t mean I won’t miss it.

—Some recent bodily thoughts—

Teeth: Lately I’ve become phobic about my teeth falling out. I was eating some Milk Duds last week and I swear I felt a tiny bit of my filling come loose. I saw a tiny spec of porcelain on my finger. My face turned red and my heart raced. I had a flashback to the time my tooth cracked off in San Francisco. Now, every time I get a weird bite of something tiny and hard I panic. It’s usually just a little seed or bit of grain. Fortunately I see the dentist in two days.

Feet: I’ve officially given up. I used to occasionally get pedicures with my sister in Houston. I’d paint the little piggies myself sometimes. I’d make attempts to scrub with pumice in the tub. I don’t care anymore. Feet are for transport. Sure, I’ll keep the nails clipped. I’ll do the bare minimum, but that’s IT. No more foot frills. I don’t care.

Hair: I have no desire for short hair. It’s finally the longest it’s been since the compulsory trauma chop in 2006. I want to keep it growing. I want my hand to get stuck in it. I love my long(er) hair right now!

On a totally silly and unrelated note, I found this next to my garbage can under my sink. Made me giggle.

ANXIETY
Definition: worry, tension
Synonyms: all-overs, angst, ants in pants, apprehension, botheration, butterflies, care, cold sweat, concern, creeps, disquiet, disquietude, distress, doubt, downer, drag, dread, fidgets, flap, foreboding, fretfulness, fuss, goose bumps, heebie-jeebies, jitters, jumps, misery, misgiving, mistrust, nail-biting, needles, nervousness, panic, pins and needles, restlessness, shakes, shivers, solicitude, suffering, suspense, sweat, trouble, uncertainty, unease, uneasiness, watchfulness, willies, worriment
(thesaurus.com)

I’m having the worst anxiety ever. It’s a nervous worry with a shaking heart. Does NOT help that I took Excedrin this morning to alleviate headache from staying out too late last night. I can’t stop wringing my hands, fidgeting and glancing around.

BUT…I should know very soon what the future holds! And I’m EXCITED!