Wanderlusting
Fourth of July just ended. I can’t sleep. There are still fireworks blowing up in my head.
When I got back to my Mom’s tonight I had an email with my flight confirmation. Looks like I leave August 7th. Early early early in the morning. Singapore Airlines. I think they had a beautiful ad once that I noticed in a magazine.
I wondered earlier this year how people decide to stay in a city. I mean long term…for more than a year or so. I thought about myself. I stayed in Austin four years because of school. Then I stayed here because I got a job. It was supposed to be temporary. I sort of intended to move since 2008 but I just now got around to making it happen. I’ve been here six years total. Too long. And it’s not about disliking Austin. I think Austin is a great town. How do you know when it’s time to move on?
I couldn’t understand how it didn’t get old. The same restaurants, bars, stores, same people, same incestuous social circles, same roads every day, same events each year, same job, same place to live. It’s obviously my thinking that proves to me that Austin was not fitting right anymore. There must be a place somewhere that doesn’t get old. I realized though, it’s not all about the place anyway. It’s about what you’re doing in the place and who’s there with you. When you’re not doing what stimulates you and you don’t feel strong attachments to the people around you, the place can’t feel like home. Is this right? It starts to feel like going through the motions. I shouldn’t be going through the motions at age 24. That’s just not acceptable.
Granted, I’ve been able to do such interesting stuff the past year-ish. Probably in some effort to distract myself. Lots of mini-travels. Shows. Walks. Dinners. Guests. Tents in the living room. Minor league baseball games. Caving. Swimming.
It’s wanderlust. Escapism.
One day I’d like to feel settled. But I can’t imagine it now.
Category: Uncategorized | Tags: diversions, travel 2 comments »
July 5th, 2010 at 4:56 AM
It’s interesting what people with the opposite experience feel about this. Since age nine I’ve never lived anywhere longer than four years. Over the past five years I haven’t been in any one place longer than a year. And honestly, I don’t really want to stop.
I get discharged in a few months, and I’m going to travel until my money runs out.
I don’t know how I feel about having to come back to Houston, or moving to Austin, or D.C. or wherever I end up. Staying somewhere for six years is an alien experience. I don’t know if I ever want to be settled, but it’d be nice to find a city that never let me feel that way.
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I love reading this, it’s always very thoughtful. I hope you don’t neglect it once you’re in Seoul.
July 6th, 2010 at 3:06 PM
My family did kinda move around when I was younger. Houston, Massachusetts and Illinois, then back to Houston all before age 10. Maybe that’s part of the reason I feel the way I do now. So ready to leave Texas. Ready to leave the country. My family has been here 15 years now, which is crazy. But I’m glad my parents are rooted so there’s a base somewhere at least.
I wonder if the wanderlust thing is just a function of age. You know, not feeling ready to settle. I still get freaked out when I hear friend/acquaintances are getting married, having babies and stuff. In my mind we still don’t seem old enough for that. Though I guess some of us are.
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I’m NOT going to neglect this once I get to Seoul. I intend for it to be much the opposite!